dancemomThis story is actually quite long …. but I will try and make a short version and make a couple simple points.  I used to be a normal suburban housewife minus the husband -so I guess a successful single mom in the burbs raising a slew of daughters alone in the late 90’s on. I had a successful business in a normal field and honestly I rarely or never even dated much. I had had a live in bf for awhile, more out of needing a babysitter/helper at the time. But I worked super hard even taking on more than one facet of my industries work.  At one point I would get up and do one job from like 4 am to about 8 or 9 where I would sneak into a vacant office before the workers got there to do make all my files in the quiet.  Then go home to my home office to work on my other job which required to be present on the phone at least during business hours and solve problems all day. I never “got ready” such as doing hair /make up or even sometimes got dressed. If it was a day that I didn’t leave to the extra office I seriously would find 5 pm had hit and I was in my robe and my hair taped back in scotch tape and I wasn’t sure if I had eaten that day or not.   This went on for years and the kids virtually ended up in dance because at one point in the summer I needed a babysitter and there was dance try outs which took a few days where they “kept” them there. It was a great few days to work. The clincher was they all ended up making this team which lead to dance every night and practice and outfits and shows , parades and competitions.  This went of for several years and they graduated from team to company to travel and on and on. They were in solos and special production numbers which were huge. I took one trip one time with my youngest to Disneyland alone just to have her be in like  2 minutes of a production with over 100 people in it as that was commitment required. They dicated our lives and vacations and everything we did. It was kind of the military but about dance and girl stuff.

I took them to New York, Vegas, California and several colleges and places in funny places in AZ such as Needle . What town is called Needle ? It costed roughly $30k a year to maintain the dance schedule and the time into it was incredible. It was funny because when I got them ready they all wore stage make up and had hair do’s and such and I never did any of that for me at that time.  It was quite a time back then.

Well they grew up and the economy got crappy and one of them continued to dance and still coaches and works at it with a team now and one other recently is making her living room into a dance space as she loved choregraph.  I had at one point made a bedroom when the oldest moved out into a “dance room” with mirrors and bars and such.   I miss those times sometimes.

The thing is later on in life it was at first necessary to go try and work in a club and then I got my start in the movies for the money. At that point is when I first put on fake eyelashes and started doing hair and make up all.  They see me now and they know how much time I put into me and getting ready and having my space now.

They do as well have some of their own kids and having kids and they appreciate how much work it is. Heck I do to when I visit as small babies and kids are all consuming and you don’t have a lot of personal time. It is funny though as my oldest reminded me the other day how I used to tape my hair back and just work like a crazed dog and do whatever it took. She remembers me not even knowing what I looked like and just being a mom and a supporter.  At least I feel they appreciated what it took.

As for now I have a much leisurely pace and lot of personal time space and beauty regimes because of getting the opportunity to be in an industry that expects that, and not having the full on responsibity of so many people and some financial reprise from taking care of a family full time.

I know you all want to know the question of what does my family think of all that ? Well I will answer it, but not today. It is whole other story and complex one. One thing I will say though is life is real and messy and not perfect all the time but the thing is if you take the good and be authentic and move forward everyday many things are possible.

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